Why I Don’t Like the Vuvuzela

With all the debate buzzing around the Vuvuzela at the World Cup I find myself siding with the “Nuke-it-from-orbit-just to-make-sure” crowd. I have no problem with people enjoying themselves, but it really pisses me off when said enjoyment it is out of obsequiousness to manufactured ideals and products.

It terrifies me how easily this plastic noise toy became so widely embraced after some slick marketing and promotion.

First of all, every one defending the Vuvuzela as a South African cultural icon can fuck off, but not because they are wrong about it being a cultural thing, according to Wikipedia it has been around South African soccer since the early 90s, but because it is literally drowning out all the other sounds and songs that make South Africa sonically interesting and dynamic.

Second of all, is a b Flat drone the best sound South Africa has for the world? Really?

How about teaching the world to sing along to Shoshaloza?

Yeah I’m a prick and an elitist when it comes to sports, I have never liked or understood watching team sports and I am genuinely amazed/amused at the primate behavior it generally elicits.

To be honest I couldn’t care less about the outcome of the World Cup but what does get me fired up enough to rant publicly is when the rich cultural heritage of South African song and dance is obliterated by a plastic toy and the commercial interests marketing it.

My laptop gently weeps.